How Does One Get From Point P to Point V to Point S?

Oh the bitch is back! Stone cold sober as a matter of fact...

I've always wondered... How exactly does one get from Point P to Point V to Point S? Huh?

Let me put it this way. A wedding band on the man that you love? Incredibly hot. A wedding band on a man that someone else put there? Incredibly not hot.

I have never understood how a married person (or a person in a committed relationship) actually gets from Point P to Point V to Point S. Is it moral decay? Boredom? Optimism? Curiosity? Self Destruction?

We all know it happens. The numbers don't lie. And, chances are each of you reading this right now fall into one or more of the categories below:
  • You have been cheated on.
  • You cheated on someone.
  • You want to cheat with someone.
  • You know someone right now who is cheating.
I'm not asking you to trust me on that. Just look at the research.

Scientists argue that it is the human nature to be polygamous -- not monogamous. They have found that approximately 60% of men and 40% of women will have an affair at some point in their lives. That's right. Women do it, too. As a matter of fact, the number of women who cheat on their significant others is growing. That really doesn't surprise me.

What does surprise me? I have been amazed at the number of divorced men I've recently met who were cheated on by their wives. Amazed. I have also been shocked to find a growing number of men who are shunning the one-night stand in favor of only having sex with someone that they have a real emotional connection with. I have to say that I am quite impressed. Keep it up guys! You're restoring my faith in men a little more every day.

But those young whippersnappers out there are whipping and snapping all over the place! The same study found that younger people are more likely to be unfaithful. Gender, in this case, doesn't matter.

It's hard to get a grasp on infidelity stats though. I mean really, if you were asked, would you tell the truth? So, while the numbers paint the picture, it is an out-of-focus picture at best. We're looking at this far away to get a sense of what's really going on. And, would any of us really expect a person who would cheat to tell the truth anyway?

Watch Out for the Karma Chameleon. That bitch bites!
Here's a true story for you. I went out a few months ago to meet a friend at a bar/club here in McDonough. Well, she never showed. But, I decided to stick it out for awhile after realizing that I had been mercilessly stood up. I actually had a really good time.

I befriended two men there and sat with them most of the night. No, not like that. I wasn't attracted to either. Both were older than I prefer but were a great deterrent to the 25-year-old MILF stalkers. We shared a drink and I listened to their long, rambling stories about their ex wives -- yes, plural. At the end of the night, one of the men asked me out. I politely declined. Just wasn't interested. He seemed like a nice guy though.

Time travel to a couple of months later: community yard sale in my subdivision...... poof!

As I'm sweating in the sun, I notice a familiar face poking among the many baby items that I have out for sale. I then notice that familiar face is with a very pregnant woman who is wearing a wedding ring. Yep! The same guy who asked me out. I'm not sure who had a more shocked expression on their face -- me or him. Of all of the yard sales, in all of the subdivisions in this big county... mine? Really? Geez!

It makes it hard for a girl have trust in the opposite sex with such men rambling about. I read one time that humans are programmed to be in relationships for 10 years. At 10 years (not the 7 year itch after all), it is a make-or-break point. Not trying to scare anyone. I'm just saying, relationships aren't about relaxing. Relationships are about reinventing. You married women would do well to take a look at us single girls and adopt parts of our game plan. (Future blog post here, folks) For goodness sake, at least shave your legs!
It isn't just married men wearing their sneaky supersonic sexy single man capes in bars that are the problem.
It isn't just married men wearing their sneaky supersonic sexy single man capes in bars that are the problem. It is the everyday Joe that you meet on the street, in the elevator, in line at the grocery store or online as well. Not a single person I know can say that there isn't one person, male or female, that shocked them to the core when they found out their marriage was breaking up because of infidelity.

Am I the only one who is repulsed and offended when an obviously married man asks them out? I wonder, do men feel the same way? Are there any of you who are offended when a married woman comes on to you? Is it different for you? Because, I'd really like to know.

I'll go on the record. I don't have a problem saying how I really feel. I know....you already knew that. If you are married, I will be your friend. No problem at all there. I will not be friends with your little friend, though. And, if you ask me to, I will no longer be a friend to the big you, either.

And what the hell is wrong with you women (and men) who would mess around with someone who is married? For real. What the hell is wrong with you?

I guess it should come as no surprise that only 10% of the U.S. population surveyed said that they believe in The Ten Commandments. Really? Coveting thy neighbor anyone? I like my neighbor. Super nice guy. He even brings me pallets of dog food they have leftover from his runs sometimes. But, he ain't coming over here hiking his damn leg up on anything! (Not that he would want to, I'm just saying...)

Someone needs to map this crap out for me. I know how men get from hello to BS. I know how women get from sweetness to PMS. But, I just don't understand how people get from Point P to Point V to Point S? And, while we're dealing with all of these letters, what about the ones like STD and PG? Because, a cheater is sure to run into those some day.

2 comments:

  1. I concur with all but one point - ladies, do not shave your legs. Often what your man is after is just having his back scratched, and the sex is secondary, so stubbly legs do a nice job for that kind of itch.
    If it grows too long, knit it into long johns, like the German girls up in Minnesota.

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  2. Anybody that has ever experienced infidelity by a spouse knows there is or never will be a greater pain in their life. At one time I felt like if I could just go on the front porch and let out a long sorrowful howl like a dog it would free me from the pain. That would be only a temporary freedom of pain because it comes back over and over and never lets you forget. The loss of your other half is truly like the death of half of yourself. So please married people not matter how good you might feel cheating, remember that the one who really loves you is slowly dieing inside. If you want another get a divorce first and a lover second.

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